Cold Heart + Cold Pizza

As the saying goes there’s a soulmate out there for everyone. Unfortunately, unless my soulmate is in a glass bottle and called San Miguel I don’t think I’ll be falling in loveย anytime soon. I’m sure I’m not the only female in the world whose love life flops before it’s even started, but then again every girl seems to have some sort of attachment to a guy or ten.

I’ve been at uni for a nearly two months and so far, well lets just say my love life has gone from pretty great to non-existent. From unexpected breakup texts to unexpected interactions, I don’t think I’ll need to shave anytime soon (I’m kind of glad, I don’t have time for personal grooming anyway).

For most young girls my age finding someone you’re infatuated by to spend your time with is a pretty important thing. But what about when it all goes wrong and we promise to never let ourselves go through that again and gain no real attachment to a person; does it really work? My guess is no for the majority.

Love is a weird thing.. A very scary thing. For someone who has promised herself to never actually admit it to anyone it makes everything a lot harder. Dropping the ‘L’ bomb is a massive deal, not just because that means you’ve finally admitted defeat but also because it’s a bigger step than just letting a guy see you without your real eyebrows on. It’s not the easiest thing trying to have a relationship when you claim you’re a cold-hearted bitch and don’t ever have any real feelings, but it’s also difficult when you let your guard down and act human around someone you genuinely do have feeling for. Even if you do just refer to what you have as ‘just feelings’.

Getting to know someone is a great thing most of the time. Especially when you find out they like pizza as much as you do and have a love for spooning. But when it ends that’s another story. You go from infatuated to inflated within seconds and it’s pretty heartbreaking, especially when you realise you can’t turn your feelingsย off. It’s worse knowing that you don’t have much hate in your body too, not enough to cuss your former lover anyway.

After a breakup we can all admit that we start to over think and start listening to that one song on repeat day after day that reminds us of that guy that we once claimed we really liked to all of our friends. At least when it all subsides and everyone forgets you were once a thing you can rely on food and a new song that empowers you.. just don’t break your own heart. That’s more difficult to run away from.